Why Does My Boyfriend Hate Me? Know These 6 Reasons
You’ve been in a stable relationship for some time, and you thought everything was going well until your boyfriend’s behaviour changed so drastically that the only question you could ask yourself every night was, “Why does my boyfriend hate me?”
A couple of weeks ago, he was infatuated with you, but now he finds you repulsive. What occurred? But before jumping to conclusions, it is important to determine precisely what is happening. The good news is that we’ve done the majority of the legwork and come up with six reasons why your boyfriend may detest you.
6 Reasons Your Boyfriend Hates You?
1. He Views You As An Obstacle
It is essential to recognise that individuals evolve. At the beginning of your relationship, he had no idea what he wanted to do with his existence. He worked in a dead-end job and lacked ambition, and you were fine with that because you both worked in dead-end jobs and lacked ambition. But after a few years of dating, he discovered his passion, and he now wants to work towards achieving his objectives. So instead of watching television together after work, he’s upstairs building his fantasies. You find it difficult to acclimatise to his personality shift, and you are in his face every half-hour.
When he is around you, he is unable to accomplish much, so instead of returning home from work, he visits the library. In the library, he can concentrate without you interfering, and he observes that he makes significantly more progress when you are absent. Now, he views you as an obstacle to attaining his goals, and he has no idea how to handle the situation.
2. He is Attracted to Another Woman
Your boyfriend is currently just friends with this other woman, but it is evident that they like each other. When two individuals like each other, they exhibit their finest selves.
Therefore, when he visits this other woman, her home is always immaculate, reeks of freshly baked bread, and always contains a cooked supper. However, when he visits you, the only food he can smell is french fries, and you’re a touch untidy. Therefore, he becomes irritable when he is with you because he cannot stop thinking about how comfortable he is at this other woman’s residence.
However, what he does not realise about her is that she is a complete control freak, and if they were in a relationship, he would forfeit his independence. It’s not unusual for a man to abandon his partner for another woman only to discover that the grass wasn’t greener on the other side.
3. You Just Told Him That You Are Pregnant
The instant you tell your partner that you’re expecting a child should be filled with joy and happiness. In contrast, if the pregnancy was unplanned and your boyfriend isn’t prepared to rear a child, such an announcement may have the opposite effect. He may have feigned to be pleased at first because he did not want to upset you. Now that he’s had time to process the information, however, the notion of becoming a father leaves him with a bitter aftertaste. His life will change once the infant is born, and he now views you as someone about to rob him of his freedom.
4. He Believes You Are Too Sociable With Other Men
Your partner is envious of your masculine friendships. Even though you were friends with these men before dating your partner, you have introduced them formally.
Even though you’ve assured him that you’re just acquaintances and his photos are all over your social media profiles, he is still envious! Because he may suffer from diminished self-esteem. Especially if your male friends are alpha males with successful professions, and to put the icing on the cake, they are also attractive! Your boyfriend will not admit to being jealous because doing so would make him appear foolish.
Instead, he will respond by giving you the silent treatment, or he will become irrationally furious with you. To determine whether jealousy is the cause of his behaviour, observe when he begins to act hostile towards you. Whenever he discovers that you have socialised with one of your alpha male acquaintances, I can assure you he will do so.
5. Possibly, He is Suffering From a Mental Disorder
Mental disorders such as personality disorders, narcissistic personality disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, melancholy, and bipolar disorder can all alter your partner’s behaviour towards you. The condition may have been quiescent when you first met, and something may have triggered it. Or he experienced a traumatic event, such as a car accident or a family tragedy, and the disorder developed over time. However, if your partner is a narcissist, this shift in behaviour is typical.
6. He Has An Issue With Substance abuse
Similar to mental illness, substance abuse may not have been an issue at the start of your relationship. You were so accustomed to going out on the weekends and drinking that you had no idea he had a drinking problem. Recently, however, he has developed severe mood fluctuations, and you’ve noticed that money is disappearing from your bank account. Your credit cards are being charged, but your expenses are not being paid.
All of these are indicators that your boyfriend may have a substance abuse problem. He experiences mood swings when he craves narcotics and alcohol, and he is stealing money to fund his habit.
[Our Advice] What Should You Do If Your Boyfriend Hates You?
It’s not a good place to be if you believe that your boyfriend hates you, so you’ll need to investigate this as soon as feasible. Here are some suggestions for how to approach the situation.
1. Talk With Him
Only through a direct conversation with your companion will you learn what’s happening. It will be difficult to get him to talk because he may not be in the proper frame of mind. You alone will know when the optimal time is. When you eventually sit down to have a conversation, do not begin by being defensive or argumentative, or you will achieve nothing. Begin the conversation on a positive note, relinquish your need to be correct, and simply listen. You are the one who feels violated, and you want to know what you did to make him feel this way; therefore, it is in your best interest to let him speak, even if you disagree with what he says.
2. Take Help
If you’ve attempted talking to your boyfriend and you don’t feel like anything was accomplished, you may need to consult a therapist.
A trained third eye can help you resolve more quickly than the two of you could on your own. The therapist will assist you in comprehending what went wrong in the relationship and offer an alternative viewpoint to consider. If your boyfriend desires the relationship to succeed, he will agree to outside assistance. If not, it is time to proceed to the subsequent phase.
3. Move Out of a Relationship
A split in the relationship should be the absolute last resort. Nonetheless, it may be necessary to get things back on track or to give you time to determine if you and your boyfriend wish to end the relationship. As previously stated, some males are poor at expressing their emotions. Instead, they will alter their behaviour. It’s possible that your companion wants to end the relationship but doesn’t want to hurt you. By suggesting a hiatus in your relationship, he may feel relieved. Or, your absence may cause him to recognise his error, and he will return with a sincere contrition.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. Why does my bf treat me bad?
Low self-esteem is one of the most prevalent reasons why many individuals allow their companions to mistreat them. Childhood trauma, a faulty understanding of how relationships function, and the belief that your partner will eventually change are all reasons why you are not taking action to improve your situation.
2. Can someone love and hate you at the same time?
They adore and despise them, which is normal. According to my own research, the key to getting through the inevitable difficult times is to never stop trying to comprehend where your partner is coming from.
3. What are the red flags in a relationship?
In a relationship, excessive jealously and frequent lying are red flags. You should also avoid a partner who constantly criticizes or demeans you. A refusal to compromise is an additional red flag; relationships should not be one-sided.
4. What is a toxic relationship with boyfriend?
If a relationship ceases to bring you pleasure and instead causes you to feel consistently sad, angry, anxious, or “resigned, like you’ve sold out,” it may be toxic, according to Glass.