How to convince parents to love marriage?
Marriage is a sacred institution, especially in India. Well, on second thought, it might be unfair to say that foreign countries do not consider marriage sacred or pure. You exchange vows, perform 7 pheras, and promise each other that you will take care of yourself and your partner.
Marriage holds a special place in everyone’s hearts, but there can be some differing opinions of parents and youngsters.
We have never understood why parents send their children away to foreign lands and co-educational institutions and then expect them to marry someone from the same community.
When children explore the world, they won’t block their hearts from falling in love. Who can convince Indian parents? Well, it’s not just the Indian parents. Haven’t you seen the famous Big Fat Greek Wedding movie where the father is bent on getting his daughter married to a nice Greek boy?
Parents are in handcuffs – they will do anything that society demands. There was a time when two people didn’t even see each other and got married. Yes, we’re talking about grandparents and great grand-parents who didn’t get the luxury to fall in love and escape from their parent’s jail.
You’re here for a reason and we have the answers for you!
How to convince parents to love marriage? Well, it’s not going to be easy, but there is no fun if there is no story to narrate to your kids.
Let’s dive into the article and find out how you can convince your rigid parents.
5 Tips on how to convince your parents for love marriage without hurting them
Be Friends with Your Parents
They’re your parents so it can’t be that they don’t want you to be happy. Yes, there are societal norms and expectations, but you need to be friendly with your parents and tell them what you feel. How do you know they will reject your girlfriend/boyfriend without even telling them about your life?
Kids start ignoring their parents once they hit puberty. Friends become too important. But, pour your heart out in front of your parents. Maybe, they will understand your situation!
Solution: Spend more time with your folks. Take it slow!
Here’s a quick example:
Maa, do you remember my good friend Varun? He had a very bad marriage and got out of it within four months. His parents selected the girl and it didn’t work out. He is going through a rough phase! But Varun has met a girl at his new workplace. Maybe they will take their relationship to the next level and get married. It’s not so bad to have a love marriage, right?
Wait for your parent’s reply to this.
You can create such a story and try to convince them that love marriages aren’t as bad.
Start Sharing the Kind of Partner You Need and Other Expectations
Every person has the right to choose their partner. They feel scared in front of their parents, but it is a decision they should be able to make.
If your parents are strict, make sure you find the right time to share your views on marriage and the kind of partner you need. You can tell them about your dreams of settling down with a good man/woman and how compatibility matters.
You can also let them know that caste, creed, and community doesn’t matter to you. This will give your parents some idea about the kind of partner you need. Don’t do this every day as they will start feeling awkward and might feel something’s fishy.
Never Threaten your Family
How to convince parents for love marriage without hurting them – well, the answer is simple, don’t threaten them or think of running away!
Threatening your family can be such a traumatic thing to do. There are kids who leave suicidal notes or run away from their homes. Is it needed?
You haven’t fought for your love or given your parents a chance to understand your situation.
They’re your family, so don’t threaten them.
Introduce your partner to the family
Introducing your partner can be such an exciting moment. Give time to your parents and the partner to understand each other. You might want to give a little brief to your partner and parents before they meet each other.
Let both the families meet each other
How about planning a family meeting? It can be a fun thing to do. Please make sure you understand the temperaments of all the family members.
If there are some loud-mouths in the family, don’t invite them for the meet or keep them busy with some whiskey pegs or gossip.
Who could be the cupid?
Now that you have made your point clear, it is easy to find out which parent approves of the idea of a love marriage.
You can pour your heart out and say things like,
‘’Maa/Pa, I think I’m ready for marriage. I wish to settle down with a like-minded soul.’’
One of your parents could be the cupid, and convince the other one to accept your plea of having a love marriage.
Will your relatives help you?
Parents can be stubborn. They just want the best for you, kiddo! In case the parents are bent on getting you married to ‘Sharma Ji ka ladka’ or the topper from the neighborhood, you can take help from your relatives.
Relatives will try to convince your parents. Even grandparents can play cupid at times. Grandparents love their grandchildren a lot, so there’s a chance they will support the idea of love marriage.
Concluding Thoughts
Convincing orthodox parents is going to be tough, especially if you come from backward areas. There are honor killings everywhere.
If you feel that your parents are understanding and they should know about your feelings, you must do everything to convince them.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. Can I marry against my parents?
It’s likely that they’re opposed to the marriage because they’re worried about your long-term happiness with your partner… If you are certain that their quarrel stems from their ego demands, you must decide to marry him despite their opposition, and you must choose your own happiness.
2. What is the right age to marry?
“The optimal age to get married is 28 to 32,” says Carrie Krawiec, a marriage and family therapist at Birmingham Maple Clinic in Troy, Michigan, “with the least likelihood of divorce in the first five years.” “This is known as the ‘Goldilocks theory,’ which states that people at this age are neither too old nor too young.”
3. Is forced marriage illegal in India?
Forced marriage is a criminal crime that not only violates the Indian constitution’s and human rights’ guarantees, but also poses a major emotional and bodily threat to the victims.
4. What is the rule of love marriage in India?
There should be no other lawful marriages between the parties involved. To put it another way, the marriage that results should be monogamous for both sides. The groom must be at least 18 years old, and the bride must also be of legal age.