Willfully Obtuse – All You need to Know about “Willfully Obtuse”
People disregard actual problems in favor of smaller difficulties that appear more manageable. But for how long can you evade the whole truth?
When people feel unable of addressing the greater issue, they choose to focus on the smaller, more controllable components, ignoring the bigger picture. Instead of addressing the larger issue, they cling to convenient details and run with them.
Due to this tendency, numerous substantial discussions have devolved into trivial squabbles. Never attribute a breakdown or even an explosion to the last observable trigger. It takes years and multiple events for situations to escalate to the point where normal people react violently. People typically restrain their angry reactions, certain that the situation will change or that they will be able to handle it better in the future. The meltdown occurs only when everything reaches its proverbial breaking point. It would be irresponsible to ascribe the collapse to the most recent visible reason while ignoring the preceding accumulation.
Therefore, it is rude to oversimplify the issue and apply it to the present circumstance when someone erupts and overreacts to seemingly insignificant stimuli. Where does this excessive response originate? If you truly care about the person, you would seek out this information so that the situation can be settled in a meaningful and decisive manner. If someone commits themselves because they were unable to get a TV to watch a cricket match, we are all shocked that such a little matter could lead to such a tragic outcome.
But think about it – how is that even possible for a regular person? For someone to give up on life, there must have been a build-up of events of powerlessness, rage, rejection, or scorn that went unprocessed.
Of course, it is often convenient to wilfully obtuse what lies concealed between the folds. It is alleged that men stereotype women. Ultimately, it is simpler to stereotype than to go to the heart of the situation. Instead of attempting to determine what is genuinely bothering or harming a woman, blame her moods and tantrums! Similarly, women enjoy stereotyping males as careless and inconsiderate!
When one side willfully misunderstands the core issues, discussions and debates veer off the rails. Therefore, even though you may see that your boyfriend is dissatisfied with you over larger concerns, it is far simpler to latch onto a tiny issue and initiate a conversation about it. This helps negate and deflect attention from the greater, actual problem, as you are not confident in your ability to fix it! The heart of the situation lies elsewhere, yet we focus on what is obvious and maybe irrelevant!
This is truly the age of intentional misinterpretation, where people appear to misunderstand to gain an advantage over others and then dismiss or falsify information that does not suit them. Isn’t it just what trolls do when they cherry-select postings to highlight imagined insults and post wholly unrelated, digressive messages to make an incendiary point? This renders the other side helpless; for you can fight the false with the true but what do you fight deliberate misinterpretation or a lie with?
To Willfully obtuse is an art in itself, albeit a dishonest and fake one. There is nothing like honesty in relationships – to cut to the heart of the matter and deal sincerely with the real issues, rather than to be annoyingly insensitive and slow on the uptake!